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Honestly, I didn't think I would have much to say about Wrestlemania, I figured it was going to be a total shit show, and just not interesting at all...I was wrong. It wasn't fantastic, but if I am being honest, it was more entertaining than I thought it was going to be, and included a few matches that were absolutely spectacular.
I am dividing this review into two parts, as each night's card was long enough so that if I just did both nights in one review, it would easily be TL:DR. Liv Morgan vs. Natalya (Kickoff show) Liv Morgan gets the win. Not a bad match, but Nattie to think about retiring. It's clear the WWE has no plans for her anymore beyond being enhancement talent. It might be time to join her husband TJ Wilson (Tyson Kidd) in a backstage/match planning/training role, and just wait to be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame in a few years. NXT Women's Championship Rhea Ripley (c) vs. Charlotte Flair Wrestlemania night 2 officially kicked off with a title match, just like night 1 did. And just like night 1, it was a women's title match. And just like night 1, it was a good start. Charlotte Flair gets the win, gets the title, in a match that lasted a good 20 minutes. As NXT Women's champ, she has lots of new opponents to face, so it's not just Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks all the time anymore... Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley Aleister Black mostly dominated Lashley, in a match that was clearly designed to do one thing: create the storyline wedge between Lashley and Lana, that will eventually lead to their split as an on-screen couple. (Perhaps even seeing Lana reunite with her real-life husband Rusev?) Otis (of the Heavy Machinery tag team) vs. Dolph Ziggler YES! YES! YES! To steal from Daniel Bryan, this match ended the only way that it could, Otis gets the win, and the girl (Mandy Rose)! Otis is this lovable goofball character, that they teased a romance between him and Mandy Rose, only to see her end up with Dolph Ziggler because of some major shenanigans she knew nothing about...This past friday on Smackdown, those shenanigans were revealed by a masked figure (almost assuredly a returning Paige), so that both Otis and Mandy understood they had been manipulated by Ziggler and her former best friend/tag team partner Sonya DeVille, making it a revenge based match...the match wasn't important, but it did resolve the storyline in a very satisfactory way. Edge vs. Orton (Last Man Standing Match) Edge gets the win, but holy shit. I don't even know how to describe this match, other than it will be regarded as one of the best Wrestlemania matches of all time. Seriously. They went from the ring into the Performance Center area itself, the offices, and then found their way to a large storage garage for WWE props connected to the Performance Center. The Boneyard match between the Undertaker and AJ Styles was easily the best match of night 1, but this match even put that one to shame. Not only was this the match of night 2, but it was easily the best match of Wrestlemania as a whole. If you have WWE Network, and didn't see Wrestlemania, watch this freaking match. If you saw Wrestlemania, watch this freaking match again. BEYOND BRILLIANT. WWE Raw Tag Team Championship Street Profits (Angelo Dawkins, Montez Ford) (c) vs. Angel Garza and Austin Theory Street Profits retain in a match that really was pointless, other than to do one thing: Bring Montez Ford's real life wife, Bianca Belair, to the main roster, so she can feud with Garza and Theory's manager Zelina Vega (Trivia: Vega is the real life wife of Aleister Black, but the WWE has not acknowledged that relationship on TV yet) WWE Smackdown Women's Championship (Five-Way Elimination match) Bayley (c) vs. Sasha Banks vs. Lacey Evans vs. Naomi vs. Tamina Bayley retains, however it appears that the cracks are starting to form between Bayley and her BFF Sasha Banks...I expect Sasha to not only be in the Women's Money In the Bank match at the next PPV (May 10), but I expect her to win it, and then cash in against Bayley at some point, probably Summerslam... "The Fiend" Bray Wyatt vs. John Cena (Firefly Funhouse match) Ummm...I don't actually know how to review this match, because I am still not sure exactly what it was that I watched...Entire match was a fantasy where Bray Wyatt was apparently in Cena's mind or something, making Cena relive his past personas, starting with the Prototype, then the Dr. of Thuganomics, where Cena couldn't say anything unless he rhymed, it was all very weird...I think officially Bray got the win???? But who the hell even knows...WEIRD concept. I didn't hate it, I just wasn't sure where they were going with it. WWE Championship Brock Lesnar (c) vs. Drew McIntyre GAWDAMMIT, WWE. THIS is what you decided to main event night 2 of Wrestlemania with, knowing just how damn good the last man standing match was? This was basically a copy of the Braun Strowman/Goldberg match from night 1. McIntyre beat Lesnar in a total squash match, whole thing took less than 5 minutes. I am glad that both Braun Strowman and Drew McIntyre are champions, but, the WWE could have given us better title matches to put the belts on them with. Two squash matches? Against Goldberg and Lesnar? WTF? Who booked this?
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Honestly, I didn't think I would have much to say about Wrestlemania, I figured it was going to be a total shit show, and just not interesting at all...I was wrong. It wasn't fantastic, but if I am being honest, it was more entertaining than I thought it was going to be, and included a few matches that were absolutely spectacular.
I am dividing this review into two parts, as each night's card was long enough so that if I just did both nights in one review, it would easily be TL:DR. Saturday Night: Cesaro vs. Drew Gulak (Kickoff show) Cesaro gets the win, this was a throwaway match that could, and probably should have happened on Friday Night Smackdown. Women's Tag Team Championship Bliss-Cross (Alexa Bliss and Nikki Cross) vs. The Kabuki Warriors (Asuka and Kairi Sane) (c) Bliss-Cross beat the Kabuki Warriors to become the new tag team champs in a very well paced match. The outcome was not all that surprising, as rumors have been stating that Kairi Sane is very likely headed back to Japan shortly after Wrestlemania, so they had to lose the belts. If that rumor is true, then one of two things will happen: Asuka will go back to the singles scene, or NXT's Io Shorai will get called up to replace Sane, and the Kabuki Warriors, as a team, will continue. As for the match itself, it was a good way to start Wrestlemania off proper. Both teams were cognizant of the fact that without the crowds, their words (and the refs) would be picked up by the mics. SO, they were vocally taunting each other during the match, and the camera was picking it up. It made up a little bit for the lack of audience. Elias vs. King Corbin Elias beat King Corbin. The fact this match even made the Wrestlemania card makes me wonder if Elias is FINALLY going to get a push. The match wasn't much to brag about though. WWE Raw Women's Championship Shayna Baszler vs. Becky Lynch (c) Becky Lynch retains her title, in a match that surprised me. If I had done a preview thread about Wrestlemania, I would have predicted that Shayna Baszler was going to win the match, and then go on to feud with a returning Rhonda Rousey this summer. Fast paced match, probably should have gone longer, given it's overall importance, but not bad. WWE Intercontinental Championship Sami Zayn (c) vs. Daniel Bryan Sami Zayn retains the belt. The WWE should be embarrassed by this match. In what world, could Sami Zayn, even with help, ever beat Daniel Bryan? Either Daniel Bryan is injured, or is being punished. Maybe I am just being salty, because I think Sami Zayn just sucks, but UGH. This match was a waste of time. WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championship (Triple Threat Ladder Match) John Morrison (c) vs. Jimmy Uso vs. Kofi Kingston John Morrison retains. This was originally intended to be a 6-man match, but John Morrison's tag team partner The Miz is sick, and couldn't perform. So instead of canceling the match entirely, they decided to just have half of each tag team perform. So essentially, this was just a 3-man ladder match. This was the 2nd best match of the night. Ladder matches are always fun, and while this was likely booked on the fly to account for only using half of the expected performers, but this felt like a worthy Wrestlemania match. It's definitely worth rewatching if you have the WWE Network. Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins (no DQ match) A violent match, a lengthy match, and a typical Kevin Owens match. As my wife snarked, "is it really a Kevin Owens match if he doesn't jump from somewhere on to somebody?" She is right...and in this match, it was the giant "Wrestlemania" logo at the entrance ramp that became his launching pad on to the top of Seth Rollins. Owens picked up the win, but nobody is gonna remember that, what they are going to remember is the jump, because that was the highlight of the match. WWE Universal Championship Goldberg (c) vs. Braun Strowman Roman Reigns was originally supposed to be Goldberg's opponent, but he had to pull out of Wrestlemania (and the WWE in general) for the next few months, as because of his bout with leukemia, Reigns is absolutely immunocompromised, and is in the very high risk category for COVID-19. Don't expect to see Reigns on WWE TV for the entire summer. COVID-19 could literally kill him. Anyway, this match was a complete squash. Strowman won the title in just over 2 minutes. I believe Reigns was supposed to win the belt off of Goldberg, now he can win it from Strowman whenever he returns. Strowman is likely a transitional champ, but, truth be told, while the match was terrible, I am glad he now holds the belt. AJ Styles vs. The Undertaker (Boneyard Match) Basically, this match took place in a fictional cemetery. This choice allowed the WWE to "produce" the match in the TV sense, cutting and changing camera angles at key points, and setting up scenes that could be edited together to form one cohesive match. It was a great idea, as it gave an obviously stamina-deprived Undertaker the ability to rest inbetween scenes/spots, allowing for a longer match overall. This was easily the match of the night, and the 2nd best match of the entire weekend. Highly entertaining, and probably the Undertaker's best Wrestlemania match in a decade. The Undertaker got the win, but who cares? All that really matters is that this one match made the entire first night of Wrestlemania worth watching. Just a note first: I will be primarily focusing on The Walking Dead, but this thread isn't necessarily about TWD, it's really about any popular show with plot elements that just make you scratch your head. - Dave
Ok, so the The Walking Dead has been on for what, 10 years now, and has progressed about the same amount of time... First issue is the locations they set up their communities in...They make it look like the entire South is all forest, with towns being few and far between. BULLSHIT. They started out outside of Atlanta, Georgia, and are now somewhere in the Washington DC suburb area in Virginia. Now go look at a map of Georgia and Virginia. Yes, there are forested areas, but there are cities all over the place. Even if we allow for the idea that they live in the forest areas to avoid the Walkers in the cities, that doesn't explain the numerous run-ins with hoards migrating through their forested areas...If the hoards go everywhere, then surely, bunkering down in a city is better, even if just for the supplies...which brings me to the next issue: Nobody has figured out that there are a shit ton of supplies just waiting to be discovered in pretty much every town? This show takes place in the south. There are fucking Walmarts EVERYWHERE. The show starts out in Georgia, where there are over 200 Walmarts, just in that state alone. The show started in 2010, so BEFORE major chains like Walmart, decided to stop selling firearms. The Walkers don't give a damn about stealing guns. Any Walmart should be relatively stocked with guns and ammo. Not to mention non-perishable canned foods, and ALL SORTS OF THINGS you could use to help rebuild a society...tools, clothing, diapers for babies, motor oil for the vehicles, etc. And it's not just Walmarts...what about all of the equipment at all those abandoned Home Depots or Lowes? Where are all of the big construction vehicles from abandoned construction sites they could grab? I mean, shit, there is an entire society's worth of stuff just laying around, and they are busy doing everything the hard way to notice... Then, because you are still in the South, They should also be able to raid just about ANY town they find, and find all sorts of useful stuff in pantries, garages, etc. I can tell you from personal experience, there would be a ton of ATVs, dirtbikes, etc. just lying around in garages or car ports. Then just search the house for the freaking keys...Also, you need transportation? FIND A CAR OR MOTORCYCLE DEALERSHIP. Not only will they have lots of vehicles just sitting around, but they tend to have all of the keys. You don't even need to hotwire them, you just find the right set of keys, and you are good. Further, to get that dealership, there should be all sorts of cars just hanging around. Now, let's talk about the weather. In the season 9 finale, they confirmed that the Walkers cannot manage real winters. Now set in Virginia, they had a fierce blizzard, and what happened? The Walkers all froze up, and became completely immobile until things thawed out. Now, that has some huge ramifications, IF only the dumbass writers had thought of it. If the Walkers freeze during the cold, then pretty much any Northern state and Canada should be almost entirely clear of Walkers. As a Michigander, if this threat hit us, and we noticed that during winter, the Walkers were immobilized? We are going to fuck them up! That first winter, we would all get into our winter gear and go on hunting parties, knowing that as long as it's freezing out, the Walkers can't touch us! Plus, the snow plow drivers would just mow entire hoards down with their massive plows. You give people 3 months where the Walkers can't fight back, and they would do everything they could to get rid of as many Walkers as they could during that time. Then, bunker down until the next winter, and repeat. Simply put, northern states have a huge window in which they can destroy any Walkers they see without putting themselves into much danger. The North would be clear, and would thus be the obvious place for civilization to reassert itself. EVERYBODY should have figured out that it's in their best interests to head north, because humans can survive the cold, the Walkers can't. Humans in the north have a massive natural advantage over Walkers, but nobody seems to have figured that out...idiots. OK, rant over. That's just the show that immediately came into my mind, you can comment about any TV show that makes no sense to you, it doesn't have to be TWD related at all. |
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February 2021
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